Fire

Last Tuesday night, Josh and I decided to start working on my new garden. Now, where we wanted to move the garden to was at the edge of our yard in the back, where the field begins. Last year, before we moved in to our home in September, the people who lived here before us never hayed the field, so when we moved in the hay in the field was up to my waist if not a little higher. Over the winter it got packed down, so there was a good 3-4 feet of hay that was now packed down into about 6 inches on the ground... so in other words, it was thick! 

Josh was going to remove a layer of sod with his skid steer from the new garden plot so we could prepare the dirt underneath for gardening. In order to make it a little easier, so he wouldn't have to push through the 6 inches of packed hay, we were going to burn at least the four corners of our garden so he could get into the ground a bit easier. We figured if we got the four corners done, he would know where to plow up the sod and it would give him a good start in each area. 

So, on Tuesday evening, we decided to burn the four corners of the garden. It had rained that morning, and then it became rather warm throughout the day. It had been windy at times, but the wind seemed to die down before we wanted to burn the garden, and since we only wanted to burn a small section of each corner, we knew it wasn't going to take a long time at all. We prepared ourselves with rakes and we lit the fire. Now, I thought we were only going to light one corner and work on that first, but Josh lit my corner and then immediately walked over and lit another corner. Which, was just a little miscommunication on our part, but still, it wasn't going to be that big of a deal since it was just a small section after all. 

Within about 60 seconds of lighting the fire, everything was going well. We were stomping out the fire along the edges and it wasn't going too fast to be out of control... and then, the wind picked up. A strong wind came along and Josh and I looked at each other and I said 'Um, this better stop, the fire is going really fast...' But our not so windy evening turned into a very windy evening after all. Once the wind started, it didn't stop. And the fire, got out of control. 

Josh ran to get his skid steer to try to stop the fire as it was heading right for our neighbors land and I kept running back and forth trying to get the fire to stop with water, rakes, and stomping on it. Nothing worked. While Josh went to get his skid steer, I ran and grabbed my phone from Eli who was contently reading a book on it, and I called 911. 

I couldn't even see the fire anymore, it was out of sight, all I saw was smoke. I grabbed both the kids and ran to the fork in our driveway to tell the firemen where to go when they got here. I could hear my husband driving the skid steer as fast as he could trying to stop the fire but I couldn't see him at all. 

As I stood there with my kids, my stomach started hurting really bad. I am 17 weeks pregnant, and have pretty well been sick since week 8. Meaning, I haven't exercised since then either, so all the running I had just done was not exactly normal for me or baby. I could tell I was contracting, and I was coughing, either from being out of shape and my lungs were trying to deal with all the running, or from the small big of smoke I inhaled, I couldn't really tell which. And I was half crying. I was trying really REALLY hard not to cry... but I'm pregnant after all, stress just makes me cry... and I was scared. 

As I was standing there, I heard something backfire. It didn't really sound like a big boom, just like a car backfiring. I turned around, knowing fully well that my husband was driving his skid steer in a fire, only to see a wall of flames behind our house. The wall of fire was almost as tall as the tree that bordered our field. I kept telling myself that the backfire I heard wasn't big enough for it to be my husbands skid steer exploding... but I wasn't really believing myself. 

Soon, a firetruck arrived, and as they drove past a guy yelled out the window that there were more rigs coming... how many rigs? I had no idea, so I just stood there and waited. I turned around a couple of minutes later and my husband was walking up the driveway towards me. I don't think I was ever so thankful to see Josh! He told me that the flames got so high at one point (only for a couple of minutes, which is when I saw them) that he had parked his skid steer because it wasn't helping at all, and when he shut it off, it backfired. He also said that by the time he got the skid steer and drove it out to the fence that bordered our neighbors land, which he said was probably 2 minutes, the fire was already over the fence and well into our neighbors field. That's a long way people! The fire covered the distance of a good 3 or so acres in 2 minutes. 

More rigs showed up... lots and lots of them! The kids thought this was pretty awesome and I was wondering if it was ever going to end! Josh took the kids back to the back of the house to watch the firemen and all their trucks. At this point I just knelt on the driveway, my stomach was killing me. No more trucks came after that, so I finally, slowly, walked back to the back of the house and sat down in the grass. 

The boys watched the fire. 

And they thought the firetrucks were pretty awesome. 

And this was after they put out a good portion of the fire on our side of things. 

We talked to the fire chief, and then to the DNR, and then just sat there helplessly and watched. At one point one of the smaller fire trucks got stuck, they just flat out sunk right into our field, so Josh drove his skid steer out there to try to help get it unstuck, but they were stuck all the way up to the bottom of their truck so they had to call in help to get them unstuck as Josh's skid steer wasn't big enough. 

Not too long after that, a helicopter showed up. We didn't know what they were doing at first, they just sat in our neighbors field for 5 ish minutes and we were just praying we hadn't given our neighbors a heart attack or something like that. In reality though, it was a fire helicopter and they ended up getting water from our ponds and dumping it on the fire that had spread to our neighbors swampy brush land. 

You can see the little dot in the sky, that's the helicopter. They only were there for about 45 minutes or so...

The firemen were there, mostly on our neighbors end, until well after 11PM. I went to bed first, probably around 10-10:30... I was exhausted and although I stopped contracting, I still hurt. Josh went to bed shortly after the last firemen left. 

The next day, we went out to inspect the damages...

This is standing on the edge of our field, where everything started and looking out over the burnt land. 

Gabriel walked in the ruts where the firetruck got stuck. It was literally up past his knees. 

This is at the fence in the field that separates our lands and looking into what was burnt of our neighbors land. 

This is looking back at our house from the fence line. The fire was started not too far from our house. This is how far the fire went in the two minutes it took for Josh to get his skid steer. Can you say fast moving?

The only thing we have to replace after all is said and done is these two railroad ties that hold up the fence at the corner of our properties (the fire effected three properties). 

And this was the area, and further back that we can't see, that the helicopter was needed to put out the fire. 

After all was done, we figured the fire burnt about 15 acres of just grass and brush. Much more then the few feet that we had planned on burning so we could dig up my garden. Thankfully, neither of our neighbors were mad. One, whom was an ex-firefighter, said he wished it had burnt more of his swampy brush land... and he also said he was really bummed that he was stuck in meetings at work and had to miss the 'show'. 

Alas, it was an interesting experience. And stressful. And emotional. And scary.

Gabriel, and one of the firefighters, said that now I can have a super big garden since it burned so much :) I think not. 

16 Weeks

Cravings: Hmm... Nothing really that I just HAVE to have. I still love my fruits during pregnancy :)

Symptoms: Still morning sickness. Seriously, this stuff is getting old! I'm glad it's not a constant feeling. Just mornings, and occasionally afternoons... and nights... Ok, it's really not all day, well, some days it is... I swear every day is different. I am guaranteed not to feel well in the morning and then some days afternoons are bad and some days evenings are bad, and every night at 9PM on the dot I start not feeling well. I'm pretty good at hiding it though, so most people don't know that I feel like I'm on nauseous or on the verge of throwing up when I am talking to them when in reality I am. 

Complaints: I guess my only complaint/frustration is when a few people have treated me like I choose what kind of foods make me sick or 'if you would just eat x or x, I know you would feel better and have energy and not feel so sick, you just don't want to try it.' Umm... I have no control over what makes me sick! I hate half the foods that doesn't make me sick and I am so TIRED of eating them. And if eating a salad was the key to more energy (which I have a hard time putting down because of the smell of salad dressings) then I would be shoving my face full of them. It's just frustrating, and half the time very emotional and infuriating, when people treat you that way. Believe me, going on 3 months of feeling like crap at some point of every.single.day makes a lady very tired and kinda emotional and just plain miserable, so don't treat her like she is choosing it! Just because they have never been through a pregnancy where you feel sick constantly, or know someone who was sick constantly, doesn't mean that those of us who are have something wrong with us or it's some easy fix. Pregnancy effects each woman differently! Just because I'm not like you, or your sister, mom, wife, aunt, or cousin, doesn't make something wrong with me and it DOES NOT mean that I am choosing this or have control over it! Ok, sorry. I've just had two people do that to me lately and it's really not fun to go through that and you leave the conversation really wanting to cry :( 

Weight gain: Still at -12 pounds. 

Movement: Flutters and occasional soft kicks! 

Doctor appointment results: No doctor appointments lately. 

Mood: Pretty good for the most part. Sometimes overwhelmed if I think about how long I've not been feeling well, but if I take it one day at a time and not dwell on the length of sickly days and what not, then it's not so bad. 

Planning: I bought a swing and a car seat :) The swing just came today, so we have to set it up and see if we like it. I like the car seat though :) 

Advice: More advice on how to deal with morning sickness! I've tried lots of different tips, some work, some don't, but I'm thankful people are trying to help with different ideas! 

Dreams: Nothing too odd! Random people show up in my dreams, but it's not too crazy.

Baby Size: The size of a avocado. 

Cute Stuff: My kids :) 

Other events of the week: We got baby chickens yesterday! The boys, especially Gabriel, is super excited about them and asks to go look at them multiple times a day. It's also Mother's Day on Sunday and all I asked for was for all the dishes to be done, that would seriously be the best gift EVER!  Gabriel also starts soccer on Monday, so we are very excited about that! We went out tonight and got him shin pads, tennis shoes, and his very own soccer ball to practice on at home :) 

Almost 13 Weeks

So, goodness knows, I'm horrible at keeping up at blogging. But, I still keep it because I like to blog when I want too, even if it might not be that often, and I figured that's enough for me :) I have been reading a friends blog lately and she puts up weekly updates about her pregnancy. I thought it was a cute idea and how fun would it be to actually look back and see how things changed throughout pregnancy and remember how things actually were because heaven knows, pregnancy brain is great for forgetting things like thing ;) Now, doing this every week might not happen, but even if it happens a few times throughout pregnancy, I will be happy!

I kinda copied this from Britt's blog, though I changed a few things because I know I'm not gonna measure my waist each week, I'm just not that dedicated, ha! and my belly button is always going to be an inny :) But she did a good job of covering all the basics so I figured why change a good thing ;)

At the moment, I'm not quite 13 weeks, I'm 12 weeks and 5 days, but we'll just stick with 13 week sizes and what not, since I'm almost there after all!!!

Cravings: Fruit and Pizza Hut sauce (I know, it's kinda weird but it happens every pregnancy! Hence, my husband is bringing me home Pizza Hut tonight, hoping it goes down ok!).

Symptoms: Morning sickness. Ick! I feel mostly normal in the late morning/early afternoon, but morning and from about 4PM on I feel awful. It can even wake me up in the middle of the night. Hoping it gets better soon! 

Complaints: Morning sickness, lol! And I don't like any pressure on my belly, so even though regular pants fit perfectly fine, I don't like to wear them... or any pants for that matter! Hahaha! Maternity pants like to grip the belly or go over the stomach, so thats not comfy, and unless it's sweat pants with the loosest waist possible, it's just not comfy. Don't worry though, I still wear them ;)

Weight gain: -12 pounds (oh morning sickness)

Movement: Not yet! 

Doctor appointment results: I have one tomorrow, hoping to hear the heartbeat! Last time he tried super hard to find it, but the babe was just too little :) 

Mood: Is Blah a mood? If so, that's my mood. I just feel like blah all day. 

Planning: Nothing big... wondering where the baby is going to go in the house... and what it's name is going to be... but other then that, I haven't felt up to much planning. 

Advice: I've gotten different advice about morning sickness this week. Hopefully some of it will work for me :) All the things that worked with the other two, don't work with this one, so I'm completely up for any advice or tricks to manage the icky feeling. Today I was told to take Vitamin B5 and B6, or flora. I also heard to drink pop in the morning and to eat before even getting out of bed. I tried the latter, but it just made the sick feeling start even sooner then normal. So no more eating before getting out of bed for this Mama! 

Dreams: Hmm... I can't remember any at the moment... I know I had some, but I just can't remember any of them! Ha! 

Baby Size: The size of a peach!!! Well, I don't think it's that fat and round, lol, but the length is what we're going for, 2.9 inches :)

Cute Stuff: Gabriel talking to my belly is still one of the cutest things EVER! Today he laid on me while I was laying on the couch and I kept hearing him say 'I love you baby!' and sometimes he calls me baby so I said 'I love you too sweetie!' In which he replied, 'I wasn't talking to you! I was talking to the baby!' and then he snuck down closer to the bottom of my stomach and said over and over 'I love you baby! I love you baby!' and rubbed my belly :)
 He is also convinced it's a girl and will not listen to any reason that it could possibly be a boy. I will say 'Well, honey, it's not up to us if it's a boy or a girl, it's up to God... and he might give us another boy, it might not be a girl.' He will say, 'NO MOM! It's a girl. God is gonna give us a girl. He thinks we need a sister. Stop saying it's a boy! It's a GIRL!' Hahaha! 


Other events of the week: I get to go to the Birth and Baby Fair this weekend in Duluth and I'm super excited! Hoping to find some other options on where to have this baby as I'm not loving my current option (Cloquet) and I so NOT going back to Moose Lake. That and I had not a super lovely experience when I used to go to St. Lukes back in the day when I was first pregnant with Gabriel. Hoping to find some other natural options!

Random thoughts on WIC and Food Stamps...

Hi, welcome back to the forgot and sadly updated blog ;) I don't usually put my view out there on things because we all have our own views on things and we all need to respect that, but this is the little bit of life that I have been faced with and I though I would share for whomever wanted to read...

I went grocery shopping this morning. While at the store I was standing in the checkout line, putting my items on the belt like I always do. I put them on there in the way that I want to pack them. The cold stuff goes on the belt together, as do the frozen, produce, and dry goods. It's just the way I do things, call me OCD but it makes packing a breeze. Anyway, I was reminded of when I used to be on WIC. I remembered having to sort everything according to which 'check/coupon' I was giving the cashier so they could scan it through easily. I remembered it was slightly frustrating but I was thankful that there was help for the short time we needed it.

I also had a different memory come back. I remember the anxiety of standing in the checkout line with WIC coupons. The, fear, I guess, of being lashed at for having WIC coupons. I would hide them in my purse until the last minute and then take them out for the cashier. Then I would stand there, waiting for the cashiers to push things through and hope that I was going to be lucky today. See, I have heard so many stories about people being chewed out because they were in line at a grocery store and they had food stamps or WIC coupons and some person felt the need to yell at them, tell them to get a job, that they were lazy, that they were selfish ect ect. Now, stories are stories, some may be true, some not, but, posts on facebook of what all your friends think, those are true.

See, I see lots of posts on facebook about how people on government aid are sucking the life out of the government, how they need to just go out and get a job, how they are lazy, drug addicts, drunks, and irresponsible human beings. I also read posts making fun of those on government assistance and so on. Posts like that, from many different people, used to reinforce to me that yes, you make just get chewed out in the checkout line because even people you know are acting like or think like the people you heard in the horror stories.

I used to get so stressed out every time I went to the grocery store. Seriously, it was a nightmare. It didn't make it any better when I would get to the checkout line and the people behind me would walk away to a different line with a big huff after seeing me hand the cashier my coupon or make some rude comment under their breath. Or it didn't help if the cashier would give me a hard time that I wasn't getting something on the list because then, I wasn't being a very thankful or needy person then was I... sigh...

Josh, my husband, has a four year degree in mechanical engineering. He graduated right when the economy took a nose dive. There were no jobs for him, and, to be honest, there still really aren't. We moved to South Korea to find work, then Josh was offered a job in the US so we moved back, but when we got back it fell through and we were stuck with no jobs, a baby, and one on the way. Josh finally, after months of trying, got a job at an insurance company that paid $11.54 an hour. He worked his bum off, worked overtime, and I budgeted like a mad woman, but no matter what, could not make ends meet. We had one car, Josh's school loans to pay, and a baby on the way. We have qualified for WIC for over two years by that point but never took it because we had been able to figure things out, but no matter how hard I tried, I could not stay within budget on groceries. So we went on WIC and honestly, we didn't want to, but we needed too and we were very thankful for the help that we got.

My point is, not everyone that you see in the grocery line in front of you with food stamps or WIC is a government leach. They aren't all dirt of the earth that need to be made fun of or they are lazy couch potato's that don't want to work. Some of them, well, they are truly hard working people who can't make ends meet at the moment and are trying to do what is best for their family. So, chewing them out is not going to make them, or anybody else, feel better except for you. Writing posts about them on facebook and making fun of them or people in their class make them feel down right crappy and create anxiety and fear about grocery shopping. Seriously, grocery shopping. One should not have fear about getting food for their family.

Thankfully we haven't had to be on WIC for over a year, Josh has been blessed with a good job and we  are thankful for the services WIC offered when we needed them.

I don't like people taking advantage of the government any more then the next person. I think it's sad that people do it and that our government is set up to let them do it. I just don't think it's ok to lump all the people on WIC or food stamps together and treat them all like parasites.

Watch what you post on your walls on facebook, you might be making someones next grocery trip more of a nightmare then it already is.

Grandpa & Eli

This is one of my new favorite pictures...

Eli just crawled right up to his Grandpa, sat down and 'chatted' away about things he saw. It was so precious! I just love everything about it. I love the looks on both of their faces. I love that it's a generational shot. I love the roots and the tree. And, I love that is captured the moment! It's just all so perfect. I think this one is a framer for sure.